Pregnancy is a blissful time full of hope and jubilation for any couple. But it can also be exhausting as well especially for women. And by exhaustion, I mean not only physical exhaustion but mental exhaustion also.
During the period of pregnancy, there is usually a long list of all things that mothers-to-be need to do before the baby arrives or after that. Sometimes, there is also fear of the unknown. These are a few examples of the things that can bring a feeling of anxiety to a pregnant woman. As a partner and father–to–be, you need to support her. So that she does not need to go through this fear, anxiety, and all other things she might be feeling, alone.
In this blog, I am going to cover the points through which you can be there for your partner, who is a mom–to–be, during this journey –
1) Taking Care of your partner’s physical health –
Taking care of your partner is important but it becomes way more important when your partner is pregnant. You can help her by planning her meals with her, encouraging her to eat healthy food. If you are a smoker, then either quit smoking or do not smoke around her.
You and your partner can exercise together so she feels uplifted by you and by doing exercise she can also be fit. Be the one who carries the things that are too heavy for her as your partner’s back is under strain.
There are some other ways to help your partner like you can stop drinking for the period while she is pregnant. Help her out with the children (if you already have any). You could take your children out to play or can help them in the study and during that time your partner can get a well-deserved rest, she could take a nap and that rest will be beneficial for her.
2) Help her in her day-to-day tasks
You might notice that pregnancy will take its toll on your partner. She might be falling asleep early because of exhaustion. So, you need to help her out in her daily tasks to reduce the burden on her. You can start by helping her at home.
Some of the things that you can do are doing extra chores like doing laundry, dishes, cooking for her and your family. All these things will help your partner to reduce her stress of the work. She can also give some time to herself, and that will be healthy for her and will go a long way for her.
3) Be there for her emotionally –
Apart from being there for her physically, you need to be there for her emotionally. Go with her to all her antenatal checkups if you can. Support her by going to the breastfeeding classes with her and all other things that you two decide to do for the preparation for your baby’s birth.
You need to make time for her. Sit with her to listen to all her concerns, worries, and what she feels about her pregnancy. You guys need to take some time out of your day to talk to your baby.
Reading a book or articles on websites, related to baby development, together would help you two share the astonishment, jubilation of what your baby has grown in that particular period and this can also bring you two more close.
All these things will also help you two feel more connected to each other as well as your pregnancy journey. By this, your partner can know that you are there for her and you two are together on this journey together.
4) Listen to her and be an Understanding Partner –
Pregnancy does suck sometimes and it comes with its fair share of highs and lows. There will be days on which she might not want to go to a particular gathering or party that you might be looking forward to. She might not want to eat something that you have cooked because she is nauseous or for some different reason.
There will be other things about her that might change during pregnancy that you might not be able to understand. You need to understand that she is going through a period where her hormones will be wreaking havoc on her. You need to be an understanding partner and give her some slack as that would make this journey of pregnancy easier for her.
At times, pregnancy gets tough and your partner might want to voice her concerns. Her fears, worries, excitement, and much more about childbirth, the baby, etc. There will be days where she might not feel that confident. So, you need to be there for her, listen to her, listen to what she is telling you about her concerns. Be a shoulder she can cry on. Give her the strong support that she needs from you.
5) Give her priority –
It is understood that apart from pregnancy, there will be many other things going on in both of your lives. There might be work that will demand your presence. Social events to attend, etc. Sometimes, all of this might get a little exhausting for both of you. But you as a father-to-be and a partner need to prioritize her and your relationship throughout pregnancy.
Make extra efforts for her more than you usually make. Don’t forget to ask her what she needs. Take some time out and dedicate all that time to her, to find out how is she feeling and is there something that you can do to make her feel better.
6) Prepare for Childbirth with her
Prepare for labor with her. You two need to discuss the options for birth. Talk to her regarding her wishes and choices about birth. There may be a time in the delivery room, where you will have to advocate her choices and wishes about delivery. Discuss with your partner about breastfeeding, go to antenatal classes together.
You need to research this whole pregnancy and childbirth process so that you are aware of what all could happen during pregnancy and on the day of delivery. Some of the other things that you have to keep in mind about the day of the delivery are:
What route are you going to take to the hospital
Keep the change for parking ready
Don’t forget to keep your phone with you all the time, etc.
7) Look after your partner after delivery –
After giving birth to the baby, your partner will be exhausted. She will require time to recover. You must support her during this time. Your partner is going to need your support and you need to make sure that you are always there for her.
You can support and help her by taking care of the baby, trying to do most of the nappy changes. Make sure she is comfortable with breastfeeding and if you feel that she is struggling with breastfeeding or any other thing, make sure you get help for her. Cook food, do chores and do other household activities. These are some of the ways that she can get some time to rest and sleep.
8) Talk about your feelings –
You need to listen to your partner but talking and expressing your feelings is also very important. There might be some issues that you will be dealing with and you might have some conflicting feelings about fatherhood. Please know that it is okay.
When you talk to her about your worries and feeling, you might find out there are some same things that she is also worried about and you two can help each other. Talking honestly with each other will help you two a lot.
These are some of the points that will help you to support your partner during pregnancy. You have to do research about the pregnancy, its complications, childbirth, etc. The research will give you more awareness which will help you a lot during this period.
Your schedule might become more hectic during the pregnancy period but do not forget to make memories of this period as you are going to cherish these memories forever.
There will be difficult days during this period as well but you two need to remember that you two are a team and are on this journey together. Don’t forget to let your partner know how much you love each other.
This article has been written by Shivali Pandit and the opinions expressed herein are the author’s own and do not reflect the view of 9HappyMonths. You can contact the author at firstname.lastname@example.org